[on why he loves "The Daily Show":] "It saves me from sitting at home in my underwear screaming at the television set. If I didn't do this show I'd be the crazy guy at the bar sitting at the corner screaming 'He doesn't know shit about what he's talking about.' That's the reason I do it." [January, 2003] "I think people are used to people in show business having a lot of hubris. I think I have a normal amount of self-loathing but because I'm in show business it's considered self-deprecation. In normal life I would just be considered your average neurotic." [January, 2003] [on the role of "The Daily Show":] "When we spot silliness, we say so out loud. We're not really Democrat or Republican. We're out to stop that political trend of repeating things again and again until people are forced to believe them." "I see myself as a driving force for global peace. Since we ["The Daily Show"] have been on CNNI [CNN International], the border between India and Pakistan has been stood down from red alert. Coincidence? We're bringing healing to the international community." [March, 2003] [on his role in "The Daily Show":] "Liberal and conservative have lost their meaning in America. I represent the distracted center." [March 2003] [of his position at "The Daily Show":] "I mostly work on writing the show. We have a talented crew of writers and I'm like the managing editor. I am the fake Lou Grant of the fake news world." [February 2003] "We have always embraced stupidity. We have always worshipped at the altar of a man bent over with his butt crack exposed, fixing a refrigerator." [on the attitude of "The Daily Show," referring to a role played by Dan Aykroyd on SNL 25, September 30, 2002] [about "The Daily Show":] "That's the beauty of our show. Comedy or politics. We're sort of a mix. A space age polymer of both. A synthetic comedy-like material." "I was born in New York City, but I was raised in New Jersey, part of the great Jewish emigration of 1963." [7 Nov. 2002] "As a performer, I'm truly honored to be hosting the show. ... Although, as an avid watcher of the Oscars, I can't help but be a little disappointed with the choice. It appears to be another sad attempt to smoke out Billy Crystal." - on being picked to host the 78th Annual Academy Awards "You may have heard that I went onto a TV show on CNN called Crossfire, which I suppose is a debate show named after the stray bullets that strike and kill innocent bystanders during a gang fight. I said some pretty nasty things, most notably that their show was destroying America, and that he was a dick. He replied to me by saying, 'You're not being funny.' I then said, 'I know that, but on Monday I will go back to being funny, and your show will still blow.'" - on Tucker Carlson and his show