After three years of a boring relationship, Michelle Williams has finally dumped Heath Ledger.  And by "dumped," I mean "I didn't read the whole report so I'm making that up."

People says: "It was rocky for awhile," says a source close to the couple. "They did what they could to make it work."

While I am considered the charismatic love doctor of the west coast, I'm not sure I could have saved this relationship.  Usually the girls throw themselves at me and demand my erotic massage, but I'm just looking for friendship.  And a pelican.  Because they have cool mouths.
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